September 10, 2004
Dumbass & Dumbass, LLP
I'm pretty sure that's the ad agency consulting for Yahoo and Sprint PCS.
In the last few weeks, both their sites have been running the stupidest thing on a Web page since the <BLINK> tag: floating ads that disable the main function of their own sites.
On Yahoo Shopping, for example, the floating ad kept you from accessing the search box--you know, where you search for things you want to buy. With money. Right now. You were unable to search until the floating ad was done or you manually closed it. And what was the floater promoting? Shopping on Yahoo. That's what I was trying to do!
On the Sprint PCS site, the floating ad kept you from logging in to your account page until it was done urging you to sign up for Olympics updates on your cell phone, which, you guessed it, requires you to log in to your account page. (And it was particularly annoying if you weren't one of the six people who cared about the Olympics.)
Both of these examples seem to have been taken down now, but I bet you saw them too. Let's hope they were just trial balloons that completely fizzled.
At least now I know that some of the really lame ad designers I knew during the dot-com heyday are employed again.
September 9, 2004
Paint it black
I recently moved backward from a Treo 600 to a Treo 300. If you read my earlier travails with the T6, you understand why.
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My tricked-out Treo 300. |
Now, going backward in technology ain't pretty. Along with a slo-mo processor, a lousy screen, and a chunky form factor, I also got the Treo 300's hideous color, something I call Junior Executive Silver. It's the same finish you see on most of that crap sold at the Sharper Image.
So I decided to paint my Treo 300. And no, I don't know anyone else who's done it.
Taking it apart was pretty issue-free, though it really helps if you have a background in building scale models.
Krylon makes a paint called Fusion specifically designed for painting cheap plastic. They developed it for people who want to refinish those ghastly resin-molded patio chairs that everyone you see on Cops has in their front yard...and backyard...and kitchen.
The best color I could find was black, which turned out to be about as tasteful as driving a black and gold Trans Am. In hindsight, I kind of wish I had used Krylon Make It Stone as a comment on Sprint's customer support, but I digress.
All in all, it came out looking good and has been really chip resistant. But can you imagine what the gang at Smooth Creations could do with it?
September 7, 2004
Hey, Moto, picture this
I was copied on a delightful rant this week. I love it when consumers strap on the old brass balls with a smile that barely conceals their hate:
Dear Verizon,
First off, kudos on the apparition that is the Motorola V710. I've Googled high and low and have yet to find a cell phone that matches it. Yes, I have seen the future, and it is somewhere in the multimedia video clip that I can capture of my dog scratching her fleas.
My one but very large gripe with you is in regards to the 44 pictures that you saw fit to include on my shiny new "Ferrari" of phones--44 pictures I wouldn't use unless I was trying to scare someone away. The deliciously painful part is that I can't delete them!
I brought my phone back to the Verizon store where I purchased it, only to find that a trained cellular communications professional couldn't erase the pictures. So now I'm stuck having more than 25 percent of my media memory taken up with ridiculous animated pictures such as "little scowling boy beside screaming koala bear meant to convey anger."
Well, I've got a picture for you, Mr. Motorola and Mr. Verizon: picture a grown woman having to explain herself for spewing obscenities at her cell phone in public.
--Frances
Turns out Frances is not alone.
Who has an answer to this one? Shoot it to us in the TalkBack below.
