Careers

What's the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word salesman? A pushy insurance or car salesman with no self respect? Those nice people who accost you the second you walk into a clothing store? Or maybe the folks you can never find at Home Depot.

Wait, I bet you think salespeople were put on this planet to babble endlessly and waste your time until you're ready to hang yourself just to make it stop. But you can't do that, so instead you give in and buy whatever it is they're selling.

Did I get that right?

Well, guess what? I don't care if you're an IT professional, a musician, a consultant, a CEO, a recruiter, an engineer, a doctor, an accountant, or a professional athlete. You're also a salesperson. That's right, we're all in sales. You, me, your boss, your lawyer, your spouse, your kids; everyone's in sales.

You see, from time to time, each of us is called upon to sell something. It could be a product, a service, a plan, an idea, a creation, a story to a judge or jury, or even oneself (presumably for a job, not into slavery). And more often than not, it's actually very important that we succeed. I don't know why; that's just the way it is.

It's hard for me to imagine anyone being successful in life without having the ability to sell when necessary. And yet, we think of it as something unsavory or even unethical. Not only does the idea fill some people with disgust, fear or self-loathing, but to make matters worse, most people aren't even good at it.… Read more

IPOs (initial public offerings) are a huge event in a company's life and definitely worthy of celebration. That said, they're not the be all and end all that many expect them to be. Just ask the folks at Vonage what they think of their post-IPO fortunes.

Just as many things can go wrong after an IPO as before. And public companies have increased legal and financial scrutiny, plus the Sarbanes-Oxley tax to boot.

Sure, IPOs are a liquidity event, but that doesn't mean you'll necessarily cash out before things fall apart. The following ten companies, which I followed for some reason or other, fizzled after their IPOs:… Read more

No man (or woman) is an island, but I think some CEOs behave as if they're God's gift to corporate America. And what do we do to discourage that perception? Not much, I'm afraid. You don't think they get way up on those pedestals all by themselves, do you?

Lest we forget, CEOs are hired by their boards to lead a staff of highly qualified individuals in managing an enterprise. Yes, they are ultimately responsible for corporate performance--for which they are typically well compensated--but by no means are they solely responsible.

In fact, most CEOs have little or no direct or line responsibility for operating or administrative functions; those are typically handled by other executive officers. Exceptions are either temporary or dysfunctional, in my opinion.

In any case, this post is not about culpability and I don't wish to confuse the issue with facts. Dysfunctional behavior runs rampant in the executive ranks. Rather than try to be a shrink, I thought I'd provide some much needed feedback and unsolicited, practical advice to help CEOs cope...also to help us cope with them.… Read more

Think you can get a good job by blindly sending your resume into human resources and waiting for the phone to ring? Sure, and you're going to be Apple's next CEO, hook up with Scarlett Johansson or David Beckham and live happily ever after.

If you'd like to know how it works in the real world, read on.

I know what you're saying: your job function is in demand, you've never had trouble getting a job before, or you're a top executive who doesn't need advice. That may be true, but a lot can happen over the course of your working life. Your fortunes may change, the market may change, or you may even change career direction.

In any case, there will likely come a time when you will need some advice on how to efficiently land a great job.

For that occasion, here are five inside rules for improving your odds of finding a good, satisfying job as quickly as possible. And no, this isn't about resumes. Having a good resume is par for the course. All I'll say about that is keep it brief - one page if your career is less than ten years, two pages max.… Read more

At one time or another, most of us have found ourselves in a work situation that just isn't working out. We agonize and obsess over it and eventually come to the conclusion that it's time to move on.

At that point, if you think you can make an earnest go of a job hunt while employed, then fine, go for it. When you find a job that you think will make you happier, quit and get on with your life.

But for many of us, that's not the case. If you're considering quitting without a new job to jump to, this post may help you.

Quitting has the benefit of instantly ending the pain and providing satisfaction at being the one who pulled the plug. However, you'll be forgoing compensation while you search for a new position, which can be stressful and result in a premature and perhaps ill-advised job choice.

Another option is to get terminated or laid off. The downside is that age-old stigma of getting fired, not to mention feelings of rejection and a blow to your ego. But, if you can handle that, you'll find that this option has a lot going for it. If you play your cards right, you can end up with time to chill and search for a job at a relatively leisurely pace.… Read more

When was the last time you said something but meant another, or embellished the truth just a bit? Even the most honest and straightforward of us do it from time to time.

Sometimes we're trying to save face or spare somebody's feelings. Other times we're trying to make ourselves appear better than we really are.

I suspect that most of the time we're trying to save ourselves from something unpleasant by telling ourselves it's for the other person's good.

Call them euphemisms, embellishments, little white lies, spinning the truth, exaggerations, whatever you like. They're common in the workplace and everybody's guilty. You can either admit it or not, but if you say "not me," we all know you're lying.

There must be thousands of workplace euphemisms; I invite you to share your favorites with us. Here are some common ones that come to mind, just to get us started:

Hiring and firing You said, "We welcome you to the company." You meant, "We can't wait to dump all this crap on you."

You said, "I've got offers from a few other companies." You meant, "I had one other interview but they never called back."… Read more

When I was a little kid I was scared of all kinds of things: my dad, the neighborhood bully, yellowjackets, monsters under the bed, ghosts in the closet, you name it. Now I'm a grown-up and I'm not scared of anything...except my wife.

But it wasn't that long ago that someone scared me even more than my wife did. My boss. Actually, I had a string of scary bosses. Managers definitely have a way of being intimidating, and there's a very good reason for that. It's because they can.

Bosses can bully you, scream at you, threaten you, and even terrorize you. Most importantly, they can fire you or even worse--make your life so miserable you wish they'd fire you. In fact, at-will employment gives bosses the power to do almost anything they want, as long as it's legal.

What can you do about it? Well, you can do anything you want; it's a free country. You can quit, yell at your wife, kick the dog, punch a hole in your kitchen wall, or become a monk and submit to a vow of poverty. But all that's likely to get you is divorced, bitten, a broken hand, and a shaved head.… Read more

My recent post on dysfunctional workplaces sparked a moral dilemma, of sorts. It goes like this:

You have a choice. On the one hand, you can spend your career playing it safe, hanging back, being a yes man (or woman), and making sure your ass is always covered. We'll call that the "safe path." Or you can take risks, be passionate about what you believe in, speak up, stand up for what's right, and possibly commit political suicide in the process. We'll call that the "risky path."

Which path do you choose?

I, for one, chose the risky path, and it worked pretty well for me. Well, that's not entirely accurate. I didn't so much choose it as it chose me. That path always felt like it was part of me, in my blood. I could no more play it safe than I could change the color of my eyes from brown to green.

Let's assume that, unlike me, you have a choice. As much as I would like to influence that choice by telling you mine was the better way, I can't. The truth is that I have no idea.

For all I know some people aren't meant to rattle cages, challenge the status quo, throw caution to the wind. They either can't or don't wish to live their lives on a razor's edge. … Read more

Does your boss act out and throw tantrums like a spoiled child? Does your company ship most of its product the last 24 hours of the quarter? Are you afraid to bring up certain hot-button issues in meetings for fear of being humiliated? Do you spend more time covering your ass than you do sitting on it? Is your company in a perpetual state of limbo because nobody can make a decision? Does your company's mission statement change weekly?

These are all signs of a dysfunctional workplace. But don't fret; you're not alone. In fact, an entire lexicon has grown up around dysfunctional corporate behavior. See if you can recognize some of the issues that drive you and your co-workers nuts in these definitions:

Analysis paralysis. Chronic debating that obstructs the decision making process. Often a systemic problem within a company and a symptom of dysfunctional leadership, processes, and pretty much everything else. Also see disruptive management style.

Breathing your own fumes. When executives actually start to believe and make decisions based on the spin-doctored bulls--t they consistently spew out to the media, analysts, investors, customers and employees.

Blowing smoke up someone's ass. Feeding an insincere compliment or bulls--t to someone who should know better but hasn't been around long enough to develop a healthy, cynical filter against that sort of thing. Not to be confused with having your head stuck up someone's ass.… Read more