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Brain Assist is a bad title for a brain training game. For one thing, it's grammatically incorrect. For another, it's dull. Smart Thinks! Now, that's a fun title. But Brain Assist is no fun at all, and not just in name. To its credit, the game never claims to help you with grammar. Instead, it offers to enhance your "raight brain." You've probably never heard of this part of your body, but it evidently governs "artistic, intuition, strategic, and imagination." Apparently, through Brain Assist, your "raight" brain will become bigger, and you will get better at "artistics." And broken English.
To aid you in this endeavor, five nurses administer little tests that gauge and allegedly improve your mental faculties. By the way, the last people you want testing your cognitive skills are nurses, because it probably means you have a brain injury. These nurses won't even change your diaper or feed you mashed bananas. That's a shame because mashed bananas would be a big improvement over some of Brain Assist's minigames, including Match Game, Quick Numbers, and--brace yourself--Hexagonal Colors.
These aren't even real games, they're mental diagnostics. In Quick Numbers, for instance, you enter numbers on a keypad after they quickly flash by on the screen. At first, two numbers will fly by at 20 miles per hour (not very fast). Then, the speed will jump to 100, then 300 miles per hour, and then Mach 2. Then, the process will repeat with three numbers and then five numbers. What's crazy is that you can't really see three numbers at Mach 2 or keep track of five numbers at 300 mph yet, you still know the answer. That is downright interesting, though the credit goes more to your brain than the game. In Brain Assist, your gray matter is the assister, not the assist-ee.
Other challenges are less engaging, such as Spot the Difference. There are two pictures that are either identical or not, and you click "Same" or "Different" when you spot the difference--or don't. Eventually, the discrepancies become so minute that you either run out of time looking for them or guess wrong too many times and lose. It gets boring very quickly, but hey, at least Brain Assist comes with its own sedative.
