Beijing 2008 review (The Official Video Game of the Olympic Games, PlayStation 3)

There are some events that are utterly impossible even after you learn the necessary strategies and level up your athlete. Kayak is a cruel joke. You have no control over your tiny watercraft. Even if you somehow manage to pass through the appropriate gate, the game often won't register your success. Table tennis is just as pointless. Your giant body covers up an insanely high percentage of the table, making it impossible to see the ball if it's coming directly at you. A higher camera angle or translucent character would have fixed this problem, but in its current form, it's painfully bad.

For all the gameplay faults in Beijing 2008, at least the graphics are fairly sharp. The athletes are large, detailed, and animated well enough to make you believe for a moment that someone really is running a 15-second 100-meter dash in real life. The pre- and postevent replays and posturing by the competitors shows off their fine detail, but the monotony of seeing the same canned animations every time only makes this superfluous eye candy another annoyance. Having to tap buttons during the competitions is bad enough; doing it before and after every event merely to skip through the worthless extras is just excruciating.

If you enjoy laughing at others' failures, there is a modicum of fun to be had in the multiplayer mode. Either online or off, you can choose exactly which events you wish to compete in; but like everything else in this game, this comes with its own drawbacks. The majority of these events are turn-based, so you'll spend most of your time simply watching other people curse and fail. Plus, the game isn't smart enough to ensure direct competition in one-on-one events. If you play two-player table tennis, you'll each have to defeat a few computer-controlled opponents before you can square off against each other.

Even if you're chomping at the bit to compete in these seldom-seen sports, you should still avoid this game. There is not one event that offers a genuinely fun, rewarding experience. Beijing 2008 is horrendous regardless of how many people you're playing with or what event you're trying to win.